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For those of you who haven’t figured it out yet, Happiness is a decision.

I wish I would of had sense enough to figure that out when I was in college. Fall semester 2005 – Clark Atlanta University, New Residential Apartments…..My dry erase board read: “My one wish. To be happy.” I wasn’t ready to admit that I was unhappy, but I knew I was not happy.  The funny thing is, I scribbled that on there like happiness was something I would magically trip and fall into one day. “OOOPS! Waddy’a know, I’M HAPPY!!!” ….yea right.

I was as delusional as they come. Happiness is purely a decision. It’s true. We DECIDE to be happy. I have proof. Watch this video from http://www.TED.com where Harvard psychologist, Dan Gilbert asks “Why are we happy?”

Crazy right?! That’s how I felt after I saw it. Then I tried it. It worked. Our brains seem to have a mechanism that believes whatever we tell it. This is why affirmations work so well. This is also the key difference between The Happy and The Unhappy. Those who are happy have made a conscious, and very active decision to be happy, unlike The Unhappy….who have not.

This is not to say that The Unhappy choose to be unhappy, they simply have not yet chosen (or figured out how to choose) to be happy.

Here’s an example: A guy I had been getting to know, and was starting to catch feelings for is engaged. I found out on facebook. How nice. Right? It gets better. He sent a text saying “We aren’t together, yea I’m engaged. Why are you mad?” Classic.

Tears streamed down my face, but I was laughing.

Although it was the gut punch of all gut punches, I smiled.

I laughed through the tears. Never mind that the man who molested me, my father, and a string of jerks (including this one) have made it impossible to trust men. Forget the fact that this was a major betrayal of the trust I cautiously extended. Ignore how foolish he made myself along with the good friend who recommended him feel.

I laughed.

In a split second I made a conscious decision to remain happy. I laughed because God was looking out for me.

Instead of being sad some jerk lied to me and dashed whatever daydreams I had conjured up, I was happy. I was not the woman stuck with this fool. I was not the woman whose fiance’ cheated on her. I was not the chick about to marry a habitual liar. SAFE AGAIN! *whew*

Sometimes it’s the blessings we don’t initially know how to count that bless us most. Wether you look at it spiritually or as a strange loophole in your brain:

  • Happy is Happy
  • Smiling is Smiling
  • Joy is Joy

At the end of each day, and throughout each day,

I decide to be happy.

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